The 'F' Word

Mouths drop, eyes widen and questioning glances are exchanged. People shrink back as though they expect me to unsnap my bra, whip it out and set it on fire while performing a chant from a Goddess worshipping sect and denouncing all creatures with penises. Yes, ladies and gentleman, the deadly 'F' word ... feminist.

I am a feminist and very, very proud of it. Whenever I make this statement, I automatically start composing responses to the barrage of questions I'm sure to get. Many of them fall along the lines of "What?! Since when were you one of those?!" or "Why would you want to be that?!"

Sadly, most people equate feminism with the Mary Daly type and call to mind images of large, burly, unshaven women learning how to say "castration" in several different languages, planning the ritualised elimination of the XY chromosome and locking their chastity belts firmly in place. They imagine women who curse on sight of a make-up booth and who screech shrilly when a man dares to hold the door open for them.

Anyone who knows this baby blue loving, 3-inch heel wearing, make-up toting, leg shaving chica knows that that image certainly is not me...nor is it the image my self proclaimed feminist friends. So then how dare we use the F word?

Feminism has many, many denominations. Many feminist theories are about equality, not oppression of any one gender. The one I subscribe to is all about empowering women, not squashing men. It's not about claiming that women are perfect and men are hopelessly flawed. I care about things like equal pay for equal work, gender neutral language, equality in sports funding, support and scholarships, getting rid of glass-ceilings in companies and not having the phrase "...like a girl" or "...like a bitch" be the ultimate insult. I care about male-bias in religion and rape trials where the victim becomes the person on trial. The "slut/whore" vs. "player" double standard bothers me. I like to see women included in the literary canon, the clergy and all that yummy stuff. :o)

The feminists I know carry cosmetic cases, wear cute skirts and giant sunglasses ... or absolutely not, if they don't want to. It's all about freedom of choice, embracing the feminine in whatever way suits us, and however we define it, in order to be comfy, happy and womanly proud. As for man-hating? Are you kidding me?! I adore men. I'm particularly partial to love, marriage, babies and nibbling happily on his yummy obliques. Plus, I would never dream of eliminating men cause then I'd have to purchase a jack-ra...whoops! Uh...never mind. Mosey-ing along...

Looking at this wave of feminism, why would I not want to be a feminist? It's interesting how some people gag at the sound of the word...and then realise that they support most of the principles.

Anyway, I raise my glass of caramel appletini to feminism...and more importantly, to not knocking an ideology until you hear it out. Cheers!